MLKFRTS | Grade A Gas USDA Seal Tee
MLKFRTS | Grade A Gas USDA Seal Tee
- Ships in 1–3 business days. Arrives 4–10 business days after that. US only.
- 30-day returns on unworn items with tags.
- Limited drop. We do not restock. This is not a threat.
- Size guide →
American Apparel garment-dyed heavyweight · Officially unofficial
Inspected. Passed. Weaponized.
This is the seal they never authorized and the shirt you were never supposed to wear in mixed company. The oval reads like a government inspection stamp because that’s the joke: Grade A Gas, pasteurized flatulence, Dept. of Dairy Defense, MLKFRTS®. The little blue cloud at the bottom is not decorative. It is evidence.
Printed on an American Apparel 1301GD garment-dyed heavyweight tee — 6 oz, 100% U.S. cotton, 18 singles. Garment-dyed so it arrives looking already lived-in: faded, slightly irregular, almost no shrinkage after the first wash. Relaxed fit, wide rib collar, taped neck and shoulders. The kind of shirt that gets softer and more incriminating with every wear.
Wear it to brunch. Wear it to the family cookout. Wear it when someone asks “what’s that smell” and you need a legally adjacent answer.
Details
- American Apparel 1301GD garment-dyed heavyweight cotton tee
- 6 oz / yd², 100% U.S. cotton
- Vintage faded look from garment dye; low-impact OEKO-TEX dyes
- Relaxed unisex fit
- Recycled tear-away label
- Front seal print (distressed oval lockup + fart cloud)
Care
Wash cold, inside out. Tumble low or hang. Do not iron the seal unless you enjoy watching official-looking ink melt. Emissions not covered under warranty.
Milk hurts. We just put a stamp on it.
MLKFRTS Supply Co.
Dept. of Dairy Defense
Officially unofficial since forever.